Shake Rattle & Rock

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Y'all do know I've got a huge hard-on for disaster movies right? You oughta. See here or here for previous illustrations of my genre adoration. So needless to say I am as high as a flying cow about seeing San Andreas this weekend. I haven't even bothered looking at any reviews - reviews quite simply do not matter to me when it comes to disaster movies. I have seen Roland Emmerich's 2012 multiple times - that ought to give you an inkling of how fool-proof I am to actual cinematic decency when these suckers are involved. In fact sometimes I think the dumber the better. But I ask you all....

What's Your Favorite Disaster Movie?

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Do Dump or Marry: Only Refn's Men

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When I watched Nicolas Winding Refn's Valhalla Rising earlier this week and got to eyeballing Mads Mikkelsen's beautiful strange face (see yesterday's Ways Not To Die post for more thoughts upon that) it struck me - Refn's next project, the horror flick The Neon Demon starring Elle Fanning as some kind of cannibal beauty, will be the first time he isn't mainly training his camera on the beautiful strange face of a manly man.

Three man-muses have batted their lashes for him so far, and we love them all dearly. He made Valhalla and the three films of the Pusher trilogy with Mads, he made Bronson with Tom Hardy, and he made Drive and Only God Forgives with Ryan Gosling. Wait... did I say three? Three calls for "Do Dump or Marry" fun! Take to the comments and tell us which of Refn's men you'd have one night stand with, which you'd give a big fat zero, and which you'd wanna spend the eternity of your every days after beside. Go!

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... making bella l'amore with Jake.

I probably jumbled my Italian there but point being Jake's hanging out half-naked in Italy right now and I should be there. These pics (via) have him in the town of Amalfi, just down the Amalfi Coast from where I was hanging out last Spring. I guess he saw what a nice time I had and couldn't resist. You could have come along, Jake.

That picture of that dude checking him out as he walks away
 is a delight. Hit the jump for more...

The Buzzzzzzz is Building

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There's nothing really to see footage-wise from Starz' upcoming Ash vs Evil Dead show in that teaser trailer there, just some dripping gore and a quick flash of chainsaw-hand, but that's not stopping me from doing back-flips and handstands and slapping every face I see silly for enthusiasm's sake after watching it. GIVE IT TO MEEEEEEEEE. We have to wait until Fall for it, ugh.
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The Moment I Fell For... Maika Monroe

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It is our new scream queen Maika Monroe's 22nd birthday today, so I figured I needed to give her some love... and what better way to give her some love than by the lot of us ogling Dan Stevens' half-naked torso together?

Have you seen The Guest yet? I've seen The Guest maybe three times, maybe four times, and fine gratuity aside this scene is when the movie's delightful silliness really kicks into place for me and the movie starts to make sense, tonally.

Yeah that right there, that's when I knew 

me and Maika could totally be friends.

I know this post's supposed to be about her but it'd be cruel to not include the money shot. She wouldn't want that either! Anyway there's a great snippet of the blu-ray's director commentary uploaded onto YouTube over this scene, and you've got to listen to what Director Adam Wingard and writer Simon Barrett say about shooting it, it's great. They get it.
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If Maika had just done this I'd love her but now with the fan-fucking-tastic It Follows also under her belt I am even more smitten. I hope she can manage on more great horror flick before she graduates on to, you know, Independence Day sequels... ahh too late.
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Jake Gyllenhaal Nine Times

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Jake's looking fine in the new issue of Esquire UK! (pica via)
I love this photo-shoot. Classic Jake! 

Also classic is the interview inside - specifically the part where they talk to his Constellations co-star (and rumored sex-partner) Ruth Wilson. The magazine make it sound SO sexless and platonic...

"After the show, they'd go out to dinner with friends. Gyllenhaal invited her to his family's Christmas celebrations."

And then there's this bit from Ruth herself:

"We'd warm up every day, singing on stage and he knows all the lyrics to Drake songs. And Motown and Springsteen. He knows the words to show-tunes too. We went to dinner with my uncle, who puts on musicals at his Norfolk community centre, and he and Jake were singing show-tunes to each other in the middle of Balthazar. He should really do a musical."

Shade, Ruth Wilson! SHADE.

In other Jake news, his film Demolition with Wild and Dallas Buyers Club director Jean-Marc Vallee, just got picked up to premiere at the Toronto Film Festival in September! Between that and Harvey Weinstein's enthusiasm about Southpaw things really are looking good for Jake come awards season. And speaking of the latter hey look a new picture!

Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?

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Henry Cavill Pulls Out

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I don't know why I'm illustrating a post with that title with a picture of Henry Cavill and Jamie Dornan. I just can't imagine. Jamie Dornan has nothing to do with this story. It's a mystery, the way my mind works. Anyway Henry Cavill has pulled his penis out of Jamie Dornan of the military thriller Stratton that he was all set to start filming just next week! We told you about this project back in November; it's based on a series of books about a single character, and Henry was producing the film (alongside his brother) as well. Ye Olde Chestnut Creative Differences is named as the reason for his leavin'. Simon "Con Air" Wet was directing. Make that "is" directing - they're already looking for a replacement for Henry. How about Jamie Dornan? I hear he's got an opening.

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Good Morning, World

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I hope the ascendancy of Julian Edelman as a hot piece of jock ass wasn't slowed down by that ball deflating thing. Everything got laid on Brady, right? Brady's past his hot prime so I'm fine with letting him go in exchange for this one here. I prefer Julian with his big full beard but he's perfectly acceptable this way too! (See lots more of him here.) Anyway thanks to Rob for alerting MNPP to this video over here which is one minute of footage like you see here. And of course the top YouTube comment is "You're such a stud... no homo." Homo. Total homo.

Gratuitous Michiel Huisman II

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Wanna know who's hot right now? Michiel Huisman, Michiel Huisman is hot hot hot to death right now. Granted I've thought he was hot ever since I first laid eyes on him in Paul Verhoeven's film Black Book in 2006 (can you believe that movie's almost a decade old?) and we gratuitized him well before he became The Hot Thing. (Seriously, click on that link.) 

But we're in a place right now where I can't even keep up with the pictures being taken of him. On a lark I checked up on him earlier today and wham, there were suddenly fifty million new pictures. Fifty million! I counted! That's the real sign of hotness... besides, you know, hotness.

Because I tend to keep up with such things and if I'm falling behind somebody's certainly having a moment. Anyway also of note as of this specific moment is the news, new to me upon finding the pictures, that Michiel's currently filming a movie in Prague called Mountains and Stones with Josh Hartnett.

I love how every woman in that picture is just LOST in him. Anyway that movie's so fresh it's not even on IMDb yet, but he's wearing a military uniform in all the pictures from the set so I'm sold. Huisman + Hartnett had me already, of course.

Okay so we've got a ton of pictures to share!

Go on and hit the jump for them...

Matt Bomer's Dirty Piggy Talk

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First off I can't believe I haven't posted these pictures from Matt Bomer's Hawaiian vacation yet! I had posted some earlier ones but these ones are the best. THE BEST. They happened to drop over the holiday weekend when I was distracted and fell through the cracks, is all. (Did somebody say Bomer & Cracks?)

Second of all, it's 36 days until Magic Mike XXL hits and we're already starting to see the summer of the male stripper saturate with Joe Manganiello's first Details cover and now the first of what I assume will be several interviews with Bomer, this one over at Popsugar. (thanks Mac) I've argued this a couple of times since Matt came out but look no further than him for the revelatory effect of de-closeting - he is so much more colorful and fun personality-wise both on-screen and off ever since he gave up the gay. He made me laugh a couple of times in here but I liked this bit when asked what it's like working with a whole bunch of dudes:

"It's always so fascinating when you work with a bunch of guys because you see all of the pack dynamics taking place around you. Every now and again, I had to be like, 'Wait, Piggy's got the conch, motherfuckers.' But everybody loves each other. And it was a Lord of the Flies reference. I should not be making literary references in a stripper movie."

There are so so many places my mind is going with Matthew Bomer refering to himself as "piggy," you guys have no idea. On that note hit the jump for a few more pictures of Matty at the beach...

Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?

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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... cozying up with Miguel Angel Silvestre & friends.

Yeah yeah we already had a Miguel moment this morning but the folks behind his upcoming Wachowskis show for Netflix called Sense8 went and released eight character trailers for the eight main characters in the show (thanks Mac) and I'll be damned if his specific minute-point-five isn't a treasure-trove of skin. 

Looks like they know what they've got with this beauty. (Not that I doubted they would - even a blind person could see he's the most gorgeous thing going.)

And yup that's the lovely Alfonso Herrera in bed beside him up top, who we previously gratuitized the minute we read that he and Miguel would be playing special friends on this show. Why can't this show be out already dammit! Eight days is forever away!

I had planned on just watching the four trailers involving the four super-pretty male actors - Miguel and Max Reimalt (seen above) and  Brian J. Smith and Aml Ameen - to cap their gratuitous bits, but halfway through I realized the very theme of the show, the inter-connectivity of these eight folks, makes that incredibly dumb of me - clearly I needed to watch all eight...

... and boy am I glad I did, because there were moments worth snapping from all the videos. Like if I hadn't watched the video about the Indian woman Kala I would've missed Max's bum! Plus more of that orgy from the first trailer. (And not to mention I found out that the transgendered character is named Nomi. NOMI! Thank you, Wachowskis.) Anyway watch all the videos at this link, and hit the jump to see some more caps...

Joe Manganiello Five Times

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(click to embiggen) On top of the one I posted last night and the couple I posted over at the Tumblr yesterday afternoon there's what we've got from Joe's issue of Details, via their site. I know this is probably a strange thing to say given all his other fine attributes but I envy his hair. His hair is so nice! He's got a great part, and the coloring, the black and gray, makes me swoon.

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